WHY KIDS BENEFIT WHEN PARENTS CHOOSE MEDIATION

Hi, I’m 10 years old. My parents don’t live together anymore. That was hard for me at first — I worried a lot about where I’d live, who would take me to school and my activities, how I would see my friends and whether holidays would feel weird. I also worried that my parents would keep disagreeing and yelling trying to make decisions for me. I know they both love me but I felt very alone and scared.

But you know what? My parents chose mediation instead of fighting in court. And even though I’m just a kid, I can tell you why that mattered.

1. I Felt Like They Were Listening to Me (Even if I Wasn’t in the Room)

The mediator helped my parents focus and talk about what was best for me — my school, my bedtime, even how to handle things when I get sick. I didn’t have to go sit in front of a judge, but I know my parents thought about what I need, not just what they wanted.

2. It Was Faster (and That Meant Less Stress for Me)

I didn’t have to live for months or years wondering what would happen. The plan was figured out pretty quickly. That meant fewer nights lying awake thinking: What if I can’t see Dad on weekends anymore? What if Mom moves away? These are things us kids worry about.

3. My Parents Got to Decide Together

In mediation, my parents made the decisions. They didn’t let a stranger in a black robe decide when I’d see each of them and make decisions about me. My parents know me best and what I need. I think that made them both feel more in control — and less angry.

4. There Was Less Fighting

Okay, my parents don’t always agree. But the mediator helped them calm down and talk without yelling. That meant I didn’t feel stuck in the middle or like I had to pick sides.

5. My Life Feels More Normal Now

Because of mediation, my parents have a parenting plan they both agreed on. I know when I will spend time with each of them, when I’ll see my friends, and how holidays will work. My life feels predictable again — and that helps me just be a kid. It makes me feel secure and safe. And happier.

Final Thought (from a Kid Who’s Lived It)

Parents, if you’re deciding between court and mediation, I can’t tell you what to do. But I can tell you this: when you choose mediation, your kids feel the difference. We get less stress, less confusion, and more of what we need most — stability and love and focus from both of you.

And honestly? That’s the best gift you can give us.